Self Reflection

I love self reflection.  This humble assessment is the beginning of growth and development.  When we focus internally, we find the reason we were born.  Our purpose is to serve.

"The only journey is the one within."

- Rilke

"In fact, my soul and yours are the same.  You appear in me, I in you.  We hide in each other."

- Rumi

"I am in the Father, and you are in me, and I am in you."

- Bible

We walk together when we walk with God.  We are all connected to Divinity.  Move with reverence for all life.  Build and rebuild relationships.  Rejoice, every face you see is the face of God.

Serve Others

I find that to retain and or build my belief in myself, 

it is important to help others build their belief in themselves.  

If you wish to experience joy, 

help others experience joy.

If you wish to experience acceptance, 

then be accepting of those that are different than you.

If you wish to feel forgiveness, 

then be forgiving.

If you wish to feel safe and secure, 

then help others to be safe and secure.

If you want to feel valued, 

then help others to be valued.

If you want to experience friendship, 

then be a good friend.

If you want to be at peace, 

then help others find peace.

If you want to be loved, 

then give love.

Whatever we want for ourselves, 

we must help others find the same.

Neuroscience Supports Social Emotional Learning

Richard Davidson, a neuroscientist, has integrated neuroimaging research into a unified theory of the happy brain.  Davidson explains that there are 4 independent brain circuits that influence our lasting health and wellness.

The first circuit is "our ability to maintain positive states."  Spiritual teachers like the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu say that love and compassion is the way to happiness.

The second brain circuit is responsible for "our ability to recover from negative states."  This supports the work of resiliency which is flourishing in our school programming.

The third circuit is "our ability to focus and avoid mind wandering."  This is mindfulness, meditation, and contemplation.  Our friends Brain Aikens, Jessie McFarland and Josh Gansky are teaching children and adults this essential skill and it clearly impacts health and well-being.  Neuroscience proves the ability to focus attention is fundamental.

The fourth circuit is "our ability to be generous."  This is wonderful and powerful.  We have an entire circuit in our brain devoted to generosity.  We feel good when we are kind, loving and giving.  We also feel good when we are treated with kindness, love and generosity.  We also know those that witness kindness, love and generosity also feel healthier and happier.

Neuroscience proves, as human beings, we are hardwired for compassion, generosity, love and resiliency.

- Adapted from "The Book of Joy" by His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, 2016

Relationships and their teachings

"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not twist them to fit our own image.  Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them."

- Thomas Merton

Relationships teach us everything about life.  We soar, we fall, we love, we anger, we find truth and betrayal, we are compassionate and we can be cruel.  I believe we must continually open the door to our hearts and minds to learn and to heal.  Every lesson teaches, every lesson transforms.  Spirit teaches us.  We are all one.  We are all beloved.

Kindness

If you see someone being courageous, let them know.  They might be moving through a tremendous amount of doubt and challenge.  If you see someone being compassionate, let them know.  They may be coming through a time of sadness or loss.  When we reach out and share our love we help others see how lovable they truly are.  Kindness is the strongest cure.

Kindness is one of the most powerful forces in the universe.  Bright and warm as the sun, it melts the ice and snow of betrayal, anger, hurt and distrust.  Kindness is the antidote to broken relationships.  When we have been hurt and wounded, as we repair, we are best served by being kind.  When given an opportunity to recommit, speak with kindness.  When attempting to let go and move ahead, act with kindness.  With kindness, we start to soften.  With kindness, we see perspective.  With kindness, we can stand in our truth.  With kindness, we can claim our integrity.  With kindness, we become one.

Everyday is your Birthday

Today is a special day.  Today we honor a singular event in the history of the world.  Your birth brought love and kindness to the world.  Your life has blessed hundreds of other lives.

Today is your birthday.  Choose how you wish to celebrate.  Dance and sing with joy or peacefully give thanks.  Do whatever is meaningful to you.  Do whatever brings you joy.

You are a gift.  Your unique talents, skills and visions make a difference in the world.  You are a rare and beautiful gift from God.  You have touched many lives and the world is a bit better because you are here.

Thank you for your courage.  Thank you for accepting the challenges of life.  Every time we are vulnerable and authentic, we give others permission to be courageous and do the same.  This is freedom.  This brings us close to each other and close to God.

Today, count your blessings, who has loved and supported you?  What grace have you received?  What beauty have you seen?  What wisdom have you earned?  What strength have you garnered?

Thank God for your love, your life, your health and your happiness.  You are blessed.

Follow the still, small voice of spirit.  Follow your path.  Listen to your heart's desire.  Believe in yourself as God believes in you.

"Let me keep surrendering myself until I am utterly transparent." - Psalm 19, Stephen Mitchell translation

I strive to stay open, be authentic, be real.  In staying open, we are choosing to be vulnerable.  Brene Brown reminds us that vulnerability is the birth place of human greatness.  Spirit asks us to be receptive.  By letting life in, we trust the process.  Life is continually building and breaking down and we are part of this process.  The challenge is staying open, renewing our trust and being transparent.  I am still learning and that is the process of life.

Kindness Evolution

We are united.  

I am in you, you are in me.  

When our egos are worn down, it is hard to tolerate narcissism.  

When humbled, it is a challenge to be around self centeredness.  

Our service to others burns away all elitism.  

Kindness is the next evolutionary norm.  

Giving and receiving in love transforms us.  

We are lovable, we are loving, and we all make mistakes.  

Mistakes are simply another opportunity to be kind to yourself and others.

The Work

It is not easy to stand in front of a group of people and share your heart.  It is not easy to be vulnerable and share your dream, and that is what I have always done.  

I will turn 66 in May.  My life has been a life of shared joy, passion and positivity with schools, teachers, students, administrators and parents.  I have shared my dreams and passion with anyone kind enough to listen.  Listeners in large auditoriums, lecture halls, and classrooms.  I have always done my best to answer the call.  Airplanes, trains, and automobiles and sometimes a good long walk.  If you asked, I was there.

I was a young man when this started.  Sharing a passion more ancient than my years.  I am an older man now, knowing that the "Work" still is not complete.  I am renewed everyday in the "Work."  Every face I've seen, every hand I have held, every heart I've touched is a part of me.

My message now comes from a place deep in my soul.  The Work comes from a place that has known decades of life and death.  The Work now comes from a place that only those courageous enough to be vulnerable and authentic understand.  The Work is always about compassion, courage, empathy, connection and service.

I have always loved the work.
I have always loved you; listener, student, friend.
I have always loved my friends.
I have always loved my family.
Somedays I am barely able to stand.
Most days I am thrilled to be able to walk.
I am still sharing the message.
I am still answering the call.
I am here with you, my voice, my heart, my soul.
After 45 years on the road, I am still here.
The road is long, dark, cold, ice and snow and long hours away from home.
I have never forgotten where I've been.
I am clear on where I am going.
Every speech, every class, every conversation is a step homeward.
My daughter has always been my angelic guide.
My sons continue to be my teachers.
My friends are always in my heart.
Sandra is my love.
I always find my way home.

Feel the Fear and Continue Living

Fear is an unwanted companion.  

He has taught me to be safe and he has also taught me to stop growing.

At every moment of my experience with pain, fear is there teaching both lies and truth.  In truth he reminds me how much I love this life.  I never want to lose my life and more intimately I never want those I dearly love to leave this life.  I cannot imagine life without my beloved Sandra.  And the world would hold so much less pure love without my angelic Ashley.

As I face my fear, I have learned that in my most vulnerable moments, I am my most authentic.

When in the presence of pain or stress, it is easy to see everything as an opponent to be battled.  Sometimes we see the light in the form of the cleaning lady entering your daughter's room in Intensive Care with a yellow flower in her hair and a sunny greeting in her voice.  It is then we know, in every instance we have choice.

See the pain, see the stress 

or see the blessing and feel the grace. 

We must face the fear and move forward even as we tremble.  We must feel this moment and know that this is only one moment in a great universe of truth.  The truth that is filling us, moving us forward, infusing us with courage, so we can stand in the light of a greater, more loving truth.

What is essential?

The challenges of life have moved me to dislike small talk.  I am only interested in what is essential.  In the past, my focus and authenticity has frightened some people.  Now in my 60's, I ask what is essential and others seem drawn to the essence of my question.  They see the light through the conversation.

The dialogue of what is essential is how we learn and love each other.

We are transformed through the story of connection and compassion.

I am blessed to share my life with Sandra.  I am in awe of her compassion, empathy, caring and courage.  As she sits by our daughters bedside in Intensive Care, I am humbled by her unconditional love.  I thank God everyday for the grace and blessing that is Sandra.

Everyone she touches is enhanced.

Love and Relationship

The essential thing to teach and learn is love.  We must uncover our original core as human beings.  We are here, in this human life to give and receive love.  Love is the only sane and satisfying response to the challenges of life.

"The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not twist them to fit our own image, otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves that we find in them."

- Thomas Merton

It is through being fully human that we learn to love.  It is only through relationships that we learn what is essential.  We must open our heart to vulnerability, authenticity and courage.  Every relationship will transform us.  Life tells us that we are renewed in relationships.  Our essence is found in relationships.  The meaning of life is found in meaningful relationships.  Love is found in relationships.  Love of self, love of the sacred others, love of the earth, love of life, love of God.

Happy New Year

"Reexamine all you have been told in school or church or in any book 

and dismiss whatever insults your soul."

- Walt Whitman

We humans are a walking contradiction.  We sometimes feel that we suffer from poor self esteem and lack of worthiness and acceptance.  Simultaneously we know in the core of our being we are children of God.  We are expressions of Divinity.  We live in conflict.  We are emanations of the Divine yet we feel less than others.

As we begin this new year let us begin with kind and gentle self reflection.  We know we are loved.  We are children of an unconditionally loving Mother/Father God.  Allow this recognition to start and end each day.

All assessment is an opportunity to grow and expand in consciousness and love.

We are all worthy of love, just the way we are.

Christmas Day

On Christmas Day we have an opportunity to celebrate the essential and core common values of humanity.  In reverence, we recognize that a little Jewish baby boy was born and his expanded consciousness, nurtured by  Divine love embraced all life.  This little boy realized that he was an emanation of the Divine and his profound legacy has touched many world religions and influenced the spiritual development of humanity.  We continue to be guided by the master teachers core values; unconditional love, empathy, compassion, courage, vulnerability, sacrifice and inclusion for all.

As we enjoy our personal and familial traditions, let us humbly remember the source.  We are all brothers and sisters in God's love.  Reflect on the qualities of Jesus and assess your common ground.  Know that as you interact with others on this day you interact with God's children.  When we offer love and acceptance, we offer the warmth of God's home.  We welcome everyone in to the grace of God.

We are all part of the same Divine family.  Let unconditional love be our legacy.

"Peace on earth - goodwill to all"

"It is not how much we give but how much love we put into giving."

- Mother Teresa

"When you give yourself, you give more than you get."

- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Please remember on this Christmas season, we are all children of God.  Just as you have pictures of your loved ones on your bedside table, so does God have pictures of each of you in his heart.  You are loved, you are accepted just as you are.  The infinite love of God brings us all emotional safety and transforms all our lives.

Our strength as human beings is in our diversity.  When we respect and honor our differences, the world benefits.  The growth of each of us blesses all of us.  None of us are free until all of us are free.

"If light is in your heart, you will find your way home."

- Rumi

We are one great chorus in harmony.  The music of the universe echoes through the heavens.  "Peace on earth - good will to all."

You are each a gift of joy that God has given to the world.

Share your gift, share yourself and the world will be transformed.