Sandra and Ashley

Sandra and I have been married for 40 years.  On of my favorite things to do is sit next to her on the couch and hold her close.

I have watched in awe as Sandra has cared for Ashley, our special needs daughter, for the past 35 years.  Ashley's initial diagnosis in the first few months of her life was "severely, profoundly retarded."  I know that term is no longer politically correct.  It is however the language that pierced our hearts 35 years ago.  Ashley is developmentally 2 months old.  She cannot move her body.  She can not speak.  She is tube fed.  She has on average 4 seizures a day.  She needs medicine 4 times a day.  She needs oxygen and suctioning often and she must have her diaper changed a few times a day.

My wife Sandra is a saint to our daughter.  Ashley is an angel.  I do not write these words figuratively.  I mean them literally.  I have been witness to this unconditional, divine love for 35 years.  Sandra and I were told early in Ashley's development "she will never be normal."  "She will never be successful."  "She will never be useful or productive."  "She will never meet any societal standards."  Through Sandra's love and Ashley's divine presence, we have risen above the limiting beliefs and cruel diagnosis that would make someone feel less valuable and invisible.  We have been blessed to participate in a Divine reality of unconditional love.  Ashley is a very precious soul.  She has profound value in her quiet, peaceful existence.  She is cherished by Sandra and I and our extended family and friends.  She is cherished as a precious child of God.

To be in Ashley's presence, you feel close to God.  There is a palpable unconditional loving presence.  When you are in the presence of a soul who does not know judgement, who values you solely for who you are, not what you do, you can be fully authentic.

There is a blessed freedom that we feel when we can be our true self.  You feel that freedom, blessing, and grace in Ashley and Sandra's presence.