Living life

Every day spend some time in reflection. In the morning, prepare for the day. Pray to be of service. In the evening, reflect on the lessons and learnings of your day. What touched my heart and soul today? What fueled my passion? How did I serve the greater good today?

We are partners with life. We are in an ongoing relationship with life and life invites us to show up and be present, be aware, be responsible. How will we respond? How will we serve life?

We must reclaim our inheritance of resilience and endurance. We are designed, as our ancient ancestors, to survive any trauma.

We tap back into our wellspring of story. Our story that brings meaning and purpose to our life. We are not what has happened to us. We are our story and we can recreate our story and our life.

"If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you." - Gospel of Thomas

We must recover our sense of responsibility and accountability. We must shift from focusing on what has happened to us, to what wants to be born in us. Giving birth to our spirit requires courage. I have always found "the still, small voice" knows what is right for me. It nudges me forward, like the blade of grass that grows through the concrete. There is no barrier that spirit cannot move through.

"...not my will, but thine, be done." - Jesus of Nazareth

A life of meaning

I have always sought to live a life of meaning. I have always felt that "meaning" is the secret of life. A meaningful life brings us joy and health. 

Embedded in my life of meaning are my values. I believe it is essential to reflect on your values and be aware of how your value system dictates your choices and behaviors. A deeper exploration and sharing of our core values can bring us closer together. Happiness and health are the result of living by our core values. 

My growth process has been cultivated by disappointments, losses, and some degree of trauma. I have also been blessed to be surrounded by great love. I have grown through the death of my best friend at 18 years old. I was witness to his slow and painful death from pancreatic cancer. I was traumatized by a football injury to my kidneys as a college freshman. Away from home, in a strange hospital, sedated by morphine, I lost around 30 days of my life. The love of my new friend Joe became a lifetime friendship. He told me he visited daily. I don't remember. 

The birth and life of our special needs daughter Ashley has brought me through multiple life and death experiences. It has also brought me to unconditional love. God's love, Sandra's love, and Ashley's unconditional loving presence. It has always been my core values of love and commitment that carried me through. 

Today I notice that some folks say they would like to go back to the way it was. I imagine that means the 1950s. The nostalgia is remembering that the life experience of our parents and our childhood was somehow better than today. What we fail to remember, life, "in those days" didn't give women a voice, minorities were struggling to have a voice, and on many occasions, struggling to stay alive. In our fantasy of the past, it is easy to look the other way. To not see the poverty, racism, and sexism. 

In our climate of cultural unrest, we must reflect on the following:

- Who you are is essentially your core values and how you put into action those core values. 

- We are not defined by the judgments of the outer world; we are not our degrees, bank accounts, cars, or homes. 

- Life has always depended on good people doing what is right for the greater good of all humanity. 

So we all have a job to do. Find your place, find your role, and take compassionate action. Educate, counsel, and heal our children, support the healthcare workers, police, fireman, teachers, and all those on the front lines of caring. 

Our future is asking of us to show up. Show up physically, emotionally, mentally, socially, and spiritually. The goal of life is not happiness. Happiness comes and goes like the weather. Meaning is the key to a fullfilling life. 

Ashley

You were and can continue to be the soul of our family. 

You did not join this life easily and you left us much too soon. 

I hear your voice in my silent prayers and you whisper "I love you" in the gentle breeze. You brought the quiet joy of unconditional love into our home, and you brought the light of Divine wisdom.

I still see God's footprints on your bedroom floor.

Your essence is at the heart of my life's greatest mystery. Where you came from, and where you went, I don't really know. But I know the universe is a better place with you in it. Your love left a piece of divinity in each of us. You were always home with God. 

You changed the world, not by what you said and did, but by the quality of your soul. You served the world by pulsating unconditional love. You were joined with Divinity and brought peace to each and every day. 

Storytelling and Listening

I love storytelling. I love telling my stories and I love listening to your stories. I always find common ground. 

I find storytelling to be a healing process. The process of storytelling is at best, a relational process. There is the storyteller and the listener. The listener is essential to the storytelling process. If there is no listener, there is no understanding.

"Listening, in and of itself, is healing. " - Dr. Yvonne Kaye

Listening asks us to be open, patient, and humble. We must be fully present. Turn off the cell phone, put away the shopping list, and focus on the storyteller. When we listen, we step empathetically into the life of the storyteller. And as storytellers, we seek to be understood by the listener.

This process is called unity.

As a storyteller, I open my heart and place it in your hands. I dare to believe you are listening and you want to be understood.

I dare to hope.

Tell your story

“Whoever survives a test, whatever it might be, must tell the story. That is his duty.” - Ellie Weisel

Living my life and not being able to see my beautiful special needs daughter Ashley, is an ongoing test. Throughout her life, I loved that part of my responsibility, and joy was to share her story. Now that she is no longer with us in physical form, I feel even more compelled to share her story. 

When we tell our story, and the stories of our departed loved ones, we affirm life. We affirm our lives together. We affirm the walks in her wheelchair, the days at the beach, the special moments when she touched someone’s life and the miraculous moments when she survived all the medical challenges.

When I tell her story, I am aware that my grief subsides a little and my healing continues. Telling Ashley‘s story has also been a gift to all those that listen. It is in this story sharing that we feel our deep kinship. We give others the permission to share their stories and we feel unity. 

We share moments of hope, support, faith, and compassion. 

Tell your story. 

Forgiveness

We must stop identifying with the experiences in life that have hurt. We must take the greatest risk of all - love ourselves. If we keep the pain of hurt and resentment fresh, we will keep our wounds from healing. In this condition, we will not heal. 

Forgiveness has deep rewards. The depth of forgiveness substitutes peace for resentment. Our wounds begin to heal with forgiveness and life begins anew. 

The origin of the word "forgive" means to both give and receive. To "give for". The inner experience of forgiveness is to return to the flow of life. 

The flow of giving and receiving.

Peace.

Love…

Love is more than an emotion. Love is a state of self awareness. Love is how we walk through the world. Love is how we see ourselves and how we see everyone else. We may find our love for God in a beautiful tree, a flowering garden, a loving pet, or a deep and intimate friendship. 

When we focus on loving service to others, we triumph over our selfishness. The more love we give, the more love we have to give. 

Begin your loving practice by mentally wishing others a peaceful and loving day. 

Love brings peace and joy. 

Listen

It is who you are, not what you know that brings peace and healing. 

Let us open our hearts to the presence of unconditional love. Open your heart like a loving sponge and listen, listen, and listen some more. 

"Listening, in and of itself, is healing." - Dr Yvonne Kaye

Sandra

Sandra is my greatest blessing in a lifetime of blessings. In my entire life, I have never heard her speak a foul word and she always chooses to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. 

She is kind, generous, empathetic, and compassionate. She will listen to you, comfort you, and feed you. She never complains and has the patience of a saint, which she is, she never misses an opportunity to do a good deed.

46 years into our marriage and I am still overjoyed that she said "yes" on the third try. Besides her beauty, it was her morals and values that first attracted me. She lives integrity. She is my closest advisor, my personal counselor, and at times, my chief confessor.

She models love. I hope you are blessed to meet her.

United in love

The dusk gave way to the stars. The starlight shone its love on the shadowy earth. Silence wrapped me warmly in peace. The blessed night erased all boundaries and I knew: she was still here.

In the days, weeks, and months of great sorrow, we may feel more sensitive to the subtle mysteries of life. We feel a unifying pulse from our heart to the hearts of others throughout the universe.

I remember in the still gasping moments of my greatest sorrow, I still felt a connection. Starring up and out at the dark night, each star flickering, a song or poem, a message. "I love you Daddy, I am always with you."

A tender moment of creation and re-creation. A gift of expanded consciousness. I reached out into the universe and found you. A message, a moment, a molecule of pure unconditional loving energy. You always were, and always will be.

Our conversation continues each day with our morning yoga, our meal time prayer, and our evening prayers. And every time we hear a song that lets me feel your love. We are united in life. We are united in love.

Community

Nothing is easy in building true community. A community is a fellowship of people who share their sorrows and their joy. We are authentic and vulnerable as a beacon of hope. In our community, we know life is full of gain and loss, joy and sorrow, ups and downs, and we know we are not alone. We share our lives together and celebrate truth and health and healing in our fellowship of mutual caring.

Our community is like a beautiful, majestic puzzle. Each little piece is not very impressive. One piece is jagged, another has a sharp edge, one is smooth, another fits easily, and some we work hard to find where they fit. Some stand out and others appear quite ordinary. Some look valuable, others plain. The magic occurs when all the pieces are brought together in a complete whole. We create community. If even one piece is missing, the community is incomplete. Each little piece is indispensable and makes it's unique contribution.

Our community is a fellowship of unique people who together create unconditional love.

Uplift

Spiritual evolution is my goal and my practice. The greatest gift we can give the world is love and spiritual union. This spiritual union, this Divine love, uplifts all human kind. The uplifting empowers and reverberates. All humanity is humbly impacted by every kind and loving thought, word, and action. All love and forgiveness benefits everyone. The universe pulsates and returns all acts of love and compassion. All kindness exists in the universe forever.

Let us...

Let us care for all God's children as we love and care for our own precious family.

Let us intervene with hatred and violence by being loving and unified. Let us ensure that everyone in our community has food, clothing, and shelter. Let us accept peace and refuse war.

Alone we can not solve all the world's problems, but we are not alone. We are all making choices that contribute to the kind of world we want to live in.

Unconditional love lives in each one of us. If we want to change the world, we must begin by changing our mind and heart. We must be an example of the love that lives in us.

Do you enjoy Thom's blogs? Read one every day in his new book 
"Social Emotional Learning One Day at a Time: Daily Reflections: SEL 365 Days a Year"
available on Amazon here

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness. Only light can do that." Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

The world needs your light now. Bring the depth of your heart and hope and healing to everyone you encounter. What ever your work, please work for "justice for all", freedom from hate and violence, and peace. Reach out your mind, your heart, and your hands, and comfort those who are oppressed, rejected, hungry, homeless, and in pain.

Be foolish enough to believe you can make a difference and courageous enough to act with purpose and passion to serve the greater good.

Help to create a human rights revolution of love, civility, compassion, optimism, truth, hope, and a rededication to democracy.

Peace

Love is

Love is where we are and love is who we are. Love is in us and around us. Love is all life. Love is the universe. It pulsates with love. It has always been and will always be. Love is Divinity. Love is God.

The love of God is the love of you. Everything is available to you. Everything is possible. Everything that can be created, can be created by you.

Embrace love.

The word of God is in you.

The love of God is in you.

You, love, God.